Thirteen years already - liver transplant

There are times in our lives when we know life is going to change but it isn't until looking back you realize just how much.  13 years ago my life changed and a lot of lives changed.

My husband at the time, Tom, was just given a life saving liver transplant - on this day, Dec 23, 2005. My sister was in Daytona Beach, Florida and my mother was coming into town on Christmas Day to spend the holidays with us.  Tom had a car in our driveway that was supposed to be picked up by a car transport service and dropped off to a guy that bought it from Tom. 

Tom with his favorite Post Transplant Coordinator

Nothing in that crazy Christmas time of 2005 worked out as planned.  My mother and sister stayed in a hotel in Jacksonville instead of at my home in Daytona Beach and Tom's parents flew down the day or two after Christmas, to be with their son after transplant.  

 The guy who paid for the car and didn't receive it when he wanted,  was sure we were Craigslist scammers.  I mean who receives the call for a liver transplant the exact time as he's supposed to be preparing a car to be delivered?? He did finally get the car but it was a few weeks later. 

Oh and did I mention that we closed on a condo in Jacksonville while Tom was in the hospital?  Yep, Dec 28th.  The folks came up to his hospital room and had him sign everything.   

Since we couldn't move into the new place immediately, we had to rent a furnished condo for a month in Jax while Tom recuperated and had appointments at the Mayo Clinic nearly every day. 

At this point in the story we are only to day 5 post transplant.  

Whew!

Tom really came through transplant and recuperation remarkably well.  He had several complications through the year - an emergency surgery 6 weeks post transplant, unexpected,  debilitating pain about six months later and other assorted things, but now I see it is not out of the ordinary. I said then and say now, that it was the hardest year of my life. I was beat emotionally and physically.   We had it easier than some and harder then others. It's a journey for sure. 

Tom and Stamer at a potluck dinner.

Tom received a life saving transplant and in so many ways, so did I.   We moved to Jacksonville,  purchased some rental properties,  fixed them up, I started going to the Liver, Kidney, Pancreas Support Group and made a lot of friends. I learned so much more about transplant, recovery, patience,  love etc., and found a real calling with those support group folks.  I rented my condos to transplant patients,  got to know most of them very well and went along for several years just being a part of the group. 

A dinner with friends - I'm standing next to Steve, who wasn't yet my husband!  I hadn't even thought of it yet. Tom is in the blue shirt, back row. 

One day (or a month or year) I decided that I had a voice and wanted to change up some things, get more people to move to Jacksonville,  have lunches be an every week activity after group, make potluck once monthly ever month, and more.  I realized this group was 100% where I belonged and damn it felt good!

A typical scene - us sitting chatting and having a meal.

At some point, (not in order) I managed to get several families to move to Jacksonville, became one of the leaders in our group, divorced my husband, moved into one of my rentals, was the caregiver to a friend (Steve) who was in need of a kidney transplant,  traveled all along the East Coast staying with friends and transplant recipients,  blogged for many years and became a pretty decent photographer along the way.  Then I married Steve and the love bubble was formed. 

If Tom hadn't needed a liver transplant and received it at the Mayo Clinic in Jacksonville I would not have the life I have now.  I am so very grateful to the donor family that said yes to donating their son's organs.  In their grief they saw life in others.  Tom is a pretty healthy, active, man in his post transplant years.  He thinks I am a pretty awesome wife and that Steve is VERY lucky!   I believe I'm the lucky one to have helped two people through transplant as their caregiver and to have found my best life with the transplant family.

Happy Liverversary, Tom

Merry Christmas everyone
Love,

Kristin